Civil War Talk

Over the past month, I've been reading Jeff Shaara's Gods & Generals, a book of historical fiction that details the accounts of the commanding generals of the Civil War, namely: Joshua Chamberlain, Robert E. Lee, Thomas Stonewall Jackson and Winfield Scott, amongst others. The book, which serves as a prequel to The Killer Angels (written by his father, Michael Shaara), ultimately serves to humanize these aforementioned Civil War leaders, recounting their personal stories in the years leading up to the war and how their individual roles in the war determined the outcome. While the book is historical fiction, it comes highly recommended.

When I was growing up, I frequently thought about the Civil War and which side I would take. It wasn't a difficult one: the Union, of course. They had size and strategy, Lincoln and Grant, along with those beautiful blue uniforms. I loved watching the movie Glory, which featured the first black troops of the Civil War being sent in to battle at Fort Wagner in South Carolina (wasn't it the 54th regiment?). It always gives me chills seeing them running on the beach at dusk, Colonel Shaw leading the charge toward the fort. God I want to cry. But Jesus, could you imagine charging a fortress, housed by 12 foot cannons and Confederate rebels? Moreover, could you ever imagine charging in to battle? It amazes me that humans, especially in the Civil War, would stand face to face, musket to bayonet, all for the purpose of doing battle - Death constantly looming.

I was sitting on the back patio at our house in San Antonio some weeks back talking about this with my Dad, trying to get his gauge on why the Civil War really started. The other reason I couldn't get behind the Confederacy as a youngster was the whole concept of slavery. I have always had a hard time believing in the concept of someone, or some race, being designated to do something for me/you, or another race. Just never made sense. I was really hoping for him (my Dad) to come out and say something like - 'Well, while slavery was a big deal, the war really began because of the states, namely in the southern region, wanting their own rights. Can't argue with that. I don't know, I'm confused. I need to watch a Ken Burns doc. Anyways, what further puzzles me: General Lee was a man who didn't believe in slavery, which further pollutes my understanding of why he sided with the South. Initially, Father Abraham wanted Lee to command the Federals, but Lee chose the Confederacy - wanting to remain loyal to his home state of Virgina. I guess that makes sense, but Lee - being such a devout man - why did he choose to represent the south, historically known for being pro-slavery (during the era). Do I seem a little confused? Let's get beers and talk about this.

This post really has no point or conclusion, but rather just wanted to get some thoughts across. I think now, at 23, I can empathize with the southern states more so than I could when I was younger, understanding that they prided themselves on the freedoms that their state was entitled to. While slavery was and always will be totally wrong, I now question whether their was something fundamentally wrong with the Union at the same time. I can't put my finger on it, but something seems so wrong and corrupt about them - at least during the Civil War era. I almost wonder if Father Abraham would sit in the White House, pondering his legacy, utilizing newspapers for his own self-promotion, ordering his generals to ransack the south, raping, burning, pillaging. Who knows? Maybe John Wilkes Booth was right all along? Speculation.

At the end of this post, all I can say is that the Civil War might have been the grandest event in U.S. history (grandest to scale, not in terms of magnificence). Jesus Christ, we warred against ourselves for 4 years! 600K-700K men died! The numbers are staggering, in comparison to lives lost at Vietnam. Do you understand this? 58K Americans died in Vietnam. 620K died in the Civil War.. at Sumter, Harper's Ferry, Bull Run, Fredericksburg, Shiloh, Chancellorsville, Gettysburg...

There's more to talk about here. All I can do now is ask that you give this battle hymn a listen, and indulge me: